Did you know I’m gay?

Have you ever been asked that question? Neither had I. Until today.

Yes, I knew you were gay fool!

Let’s see uh…there’s the haircut, the cargo pants, the HRC sticker, the set of rainbow rings hanging from your rearview mirror, the bike, the shoes, and I could go on. But most of all, I JUST SAW YOUR RAINBOW CAT STICKER.

That’s the lesbianist thing I’ve ever seen in my life. That’s gayer than Ellen DeGeneres painting Ani DiFranco’s toenails rainbow colors while watching The L Word in a San Francisco vegan commune on Virginia Woolf’s birthday. And yes that happened in real life.

I mean rainbow + cats. I could have just seen that and my mind would have been made up. Give me some credit.